Please Forgive Me…

First I have to apologize, I know that I teased you yesterday about announcing something exciting today- and I didn’t finish (or even start) the project that I had planned for this announcement- let me explain…
I know yesterday I stated that my Mojo had dried up, but after today I think I am just overly stressed.  I have been dealing with some personal issues for several months now, and yesterday my emotional stability gave way.  Some of you who follow me on FACEBOOK may have an idea what I am referring to, but if you don’t- you should :), seriously though… My son has been dealing with a crazy group of kids that have been relentlessly bullying him- but as I have discovered, after speaking with a few other parents, that their sons have been targets too.
I had the opportunity to speak to a neighbor of mine yesterday at the store and he told me that his son was bullied to the point that a few weeks ago his son left the school campus half way through his day.  NO ONE KNEW THAT THIS BOY HAD LEFT!!!  It wasn’t discovered that this boy was gone until his parents showed up to pick him up from school, then they spent the next 6 hours looking for him.  When this father told me this story I couldn’t help but break down.  I couldn’t imagine what I would do if my son went missing for 9 hours, I would need to be medicated!!!
So after I was able to calm myself, which took a WHILE, I began trying to figure out a way to make a change, a difference.  Something needs to be done- sadly the administration doesn’t seem to do much about bullying (at least so far).  The schools response to my neighbors situation was, “your son acted irrationally”, which I thought was ABSURD!!  I have to believe that there are enough parents that want to change the way these kids treat each other.  Somehow the culture at this school needs to be altered.
So as you can see I was extremely distracted and emotionally spent by the end of the day- I am excited to share my announcement with you, although it’s hard to tell.  My mind and heart is just in another place right now.  My son is the sweetest, most kind hearted little man and I can’t believe that there are parents that tolerate or condone the kind of behavior that is going on.
I have to believe that there is something that we can do as parents to help our kids learn empathy and to help them LIVE the golden rule.  I don’t know if there are many parents that continue to ingrain that principle in their kids.  Why does middle school have to be SO hard for these poor kids, and why do these schools believe that 6th graders, 12 year olds are mentally capable to be integrated with 7th and 8th graders- I am BAFFLED!!
So, now that you have listened to me babble- if you made it this far… tell me what you think.  Have you dealt with this, how did you handle it? I am in the process of getting as much advise as possible and then I will schedule a meeting with the school administration and devise a proper solution for this sad situation.  I apologize for my NON-CRAFTY post today, but I just wanted you all to know where my Mojo has gone. Thank you for listening.

Comments

  1. I do not have any helpful words of advise but I will let you know I am praying for your family and all others involved. My heart hurts for your son and your neighbors son…no one deserves to be bullied. I hope that the school will begin to take this issue a little more seriously and work on establishing better school policies related to bullying. Big hugs to your family!

  2. Sharon Robrahn says:

    I will be glad to pray for you and your family in this troubling time. Personally I pulled my sons out of regular school and home schooled them for those difficult years. It was the best for all of us. Schools have programs available for families keeping their children at home, the child is still a student of the school, but the school provides tutor and computer programs for the family. May God bless and guide you in a special way.

  3. Erin, I am so sorry to hear about all the things that have been happening with your son, and his friends! I’ll be honest growing up I always stood up to the bullies. I had a neighbor who had downs syndrom. Sweetest kid ever, but the other kids heckled and teased him all the time. I didn’t uderstand their actions then, and I don’t understand the kids who bully today either. I do know that they left “Buddy” alone when I was around! It takes a person with no self esteem, or deciency to bully and belittle someone else to make themselves feel better! Your son is lucky to have such wonderful parents! I pray that things will work out with the school and the bullies! God bless you and your family. I’m keeping you all in my prayers. Especially your son!

  4. Erin, I am so sorry to hear about all the things that have been happening with your son, and his friends! I’ll be honest growing up I always stood up to the bullies. I had a neighbor who had downs syndrom. Sweetest kid ever, but the other kids heckled and teased him all the time. I didn’t uderstand their actions then, and I don’t understand the kids who bully today either. I do know that they left “Buddy” alone when I was around! It takes a person with no self esteem, or deciency to bully and belittle someone else to make themselves feel better! Your son is lucky to have such wonderful parents! I pray that things will work out with the school and the bullies! God bless you and your family. I’m keeping you all in my prayers. Especially your son!

  5. Hello–
    I am so sorry you are going through this. There is no good solution, but our children can learn from this. I teach my children to feel empathy for these bullies as it is a reflextion of what their homelife is like. They are sad, empty children who seek confidence and attention through bad behavior. Stress to your son that this is not about him–it is about the bully’s own issues. Teach your son to laugh at himself (at least publically) and it will go away. We had several years of bedtime tears with my daughter who was the same age, experiencing similiar behaviors. (I am a mom of 5). She is 21 now and a well adjusted, happy girl. We coached her and when she finally learned how to react, her life changed. Lack of reaction is really the only way to react. Every other outburst is giving the bully what he wants.If he thinks it is not bothering your son, he will move on.
    The sad thing is that we cannot really protect our kids here. Sometimes it makes it worse. We need to arm them with the tools to handle it. Building self confidence through personal success is key here. When the bullies see that someone is comfortable in their own skin, they will lay off.
    We taught my younger daughter (also a target like her older sister) to say “that’s embarrassing” with a little attitude everytime this girl picked on her. She would say it and walk away…no matter what the comment was nor how painful it was. It didn’t take long before she got some giggles from classmates which was enough for this person to lay off my daughter.
    Schools can teach proper behavior, but without the support at home, I think it goes unheard by these bullies. After all, this is how they are treated at home by siblings or parents.
    My prayers are with you and your family. Stay strong. With your support, I am confident that your son will get through this!

  6. THE AUTHORITIES NEED TO BE NOTIFIED IMMEDIATELY. DO NOT LET THIS CONTINUE. THE FEDS MAY NEED TO GET INVOLVED ALSO. THIS IS AGAINST THE LAW OF THE LAND !!! FOR CHRIST’S SAKE, ACT NOW BEFORE SOME CHILD COMMITS SUSIDED. PLEASE !!

  7. I don’t have kids in school anymore, and I AM GLAD OF THAT!!! But I DO have grandchildren and great grandchildren in schools!!! I DON’T have any answers for you; I only wish I did, for you and all the other parents!!! MANY aspects involved!!! Will be praying for ALL!

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